GUIDED MARRIAGE™
ADHD + Marriage
Different brains. A stronger us.
ADHD doesn't just affect the individual—it can show up in the relationship, too.
Communication, emotional regulation, follow-through, time, responsibilities, intimacy, and the mental load can all become places where couples get stuck.
I help couples understand what's happening underneath the pattern, reduce blame, and build strategies that work for both partners.
ADHD-informed couples counseling in Troy, Michigan & virtually throughout Michigan.
Does this sound familiar?
Communication feels harder than it should.
You explain something one way. Your partner hears something completely different. Suddenly you’re arguing about the argument.
Follow-through becomes personal.
Forgotten tasks, unfinished projects, time management, or inconsistent routines start feeling like “You don’t care” or “Nothing I ever do is enough.”
Emotions get big—fast.
Overwhelm, defensiveness, rejection sensitivity, shutdown, or emotional flooding can turn a small moment into a much bigger conflict.
You’ve fallen into roles you don’t want.
One partner becomes the reminder, manager, or pursuer while the other feels criticized, controlled, or perpetually behind.
The pattern is the problem -not either partner.
The pattern is the problem - not either partner.
ADHD may explain the pattern.
It doesn't excuse hurtful behavior.
Understanding ADHD isn't about giving one partner a free pass or asking the other partner to simply tolerate behaviors that hurt the relationship.
It's about getting curious about why the same problems keep happening so you can stop treating every missed task, forgotten conversation, emotional reaction, or unfinished project as evidence that someone doesn't care.
When we understand the role ADHD may be playing, we can move from:
The goal isn't for the non-ADHD partner to accommodate everything.
And it isn't for the ADHD partner to become neurotypical.
ADHD may explain the pattern.
It doesn't excuse hurtful behavior.
Understanding ADHD isn't about giving one partner a free pass or asking the other partner to simply tolerate behaviors that hurt the relationship.
It's about getting curious about why the same problems keep happening so you can stop treating every missed task, forgotten conversation, emotional reaction, or unfinished project as evidence that someone doesn't care.
When we understand the role ADHD may be playing, we can move from:
The goal isn't for the non-ADHD partner to accommodate everything.
And it isn't for the ADHD partner to become neurotypical.
The goal is to create a relationship that works for both of you.
blame → understanding
reminding → shared systems
defensiveness → repair
parent/child dynamics → partnership
DIFFERENT BRAINS.
A STRONGER US.
Gottman-informed. ADHD-informed. Relationship-focused.
I combine Gottman-informed couples work with an understanding of ADHD, executive functioning, emotional regulation, and neurodivergent relationships.
We won’t just talk about what went wrong last week. We’ll identify the patterns underneath the conflict and practice skills you can actually use outside the therapy room.
Communication & Repair
Communicate without criticism, defensiveness, or shutdown- and learn how to repair when things go sideways.
Executive Functioning
Understand how attention, working memory, time, task initiation, and follow-through can affect the relationship.
We may work on:
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Emotional Regulation
Recognize flooding, overwhelm, and rejection sensitivity before they take over the conversation.
Shared Responsibility
Create realistic systems for responsibilities and reduce resentment, reminding, and parent/child dynamics.
Emotional Regulation
Recognize flooding, overwhelm, and rejection sensitivity before they take over the conversation.
Shared Responsibility
Create realistic systems for responsibilities and reduce resentment, reminding, and parent/child dynamics.
Communication & Repair
Communicate without criticism, defensiveness, or shutdown- and learn how to repair when things go sideways.
Executive Functioning
Understand how attention, working memory, time, task initiation, and follow-through can affect the relationship.
_________
_________
Connection & Intimacy
Rebuild friendship, affection, emotional connection, and the feeling that you’re actually on the same team.
Strengths, Too
ADHD isn’t only a list of challenges. We’ll also make space for the creativity, energy, humor, spontaneity, and strengths each partner brings.
_________
_________
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Connection & Intimacy
Rebuild friendship, affection, emotional connection, and the feeling that you’re actually on the same team.
Strengths, Too
ADHD isn’t only a list of challenges. We’ll also make space for the creativity, energy, humor, spontaneity, and strengths each partner brings.
_________
_________
Questions about ADHD + Marriage?
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No. I work with couples when one partner has ADHD, both partners have ADHD, or ADHD/neurodivergence is suspected and the couple wants help understanding how those differences may be affecting their relationship.
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It shouldn't be. Understanding why something happens and taking responsibility for its impact can exist at the same time. Our work focuses on understanding the pattern and changing what isn't working.
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That's okay. You don't need to arrive with the same understanding of ADHD. Part of our work can be developing a shared language for what's happening without turning either partner into the problem.
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I integrate Gottman-informed assessment, communication, conflict-management, friendship, and relationship-building strategies with ADHD-informed support. The tools may be adapted so they're realistic for the couple actually using them.
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Yes. Guided Solutions is located in Troy, Michigan, with virtual counseling available throughout Michigan.